Ramblings of a Madman...

As I sit here listening to Kem, a million thoughts race through my head. It's as if I'm hosting the Olympics in my brain. I try to pick a "winner", hoping that one will give me the inspiration to rattle off a few words. I start, then I erase. Nothing is helping. I look to my left. My bottle of water sits there, as if saying "don't look to me for inspiration. I'm the most boring thing on this planet. But I'm good for ya" *in its' Chris Rock voice*. Damn. I look at my outfit: Red/black Cincinnati hat, black tee, red balling shorts, black/white chucks. I have a coordination problem. Started a long time ago. No company coming over. No one to see me, but yet I can't throw on mismatch clothing. Anyways, off of that. I think about my situation. Funny how the word 'situation' can be used to describe different things. I have several situations, some good, some bad. The main situation causes stress, has me in here on a Friday night alone, writing, rambling. My situation seems to taunt me at times. Maybe I deserve it. My other situation puts a smile on my face. That situation always make me feel good when it's around. But as previously stated, I'm here alone. So as much as that situation helps, I need it's contact to keep my head above water. To keep me sane, if that's possible. I think about God. I wonder what He thinks of me right now. Is He happy with me? Am I too far away from Him to hear what He's trying to say to me. I think...I think...and I think some more. All these thoughts, yet nothing at the forefront. Can't even focus on lust. That's a first. What am I doing here? Besides taking up some poor saps time by making them read this, thinking that they will get to the good part eventually. Sorry poor sap. I'm just a ball of confusion, an orgy of perplexities. I don't even know what I'm talking about right now. And the sad thing is I'm NOT drinking. I would "smh" but I might mess up the race. I'm done for now....